The Abstract Art of Letting Go
Scripture:
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:31-32)
Reflection:
Let’s be real, y’all: We live in a world smeared with injustice. Every day, systems designed to generate profit for some while subjugating and exploiting many others play out with cruel precision, and watching from our own small corners of the globe can feel so disempowering. But injustice doesn’t only unfold at a grand, global level; everyone knows what it’s like to be wronged by someone. As you mentally flip through the reels of your life, recalling some of the personal injustices you’ve experienced, you might find yourself having a physical reaction. Acknowledge the reaction as it happens, and inhale deeply.
On your exhale, I want you to tether your heart, mind, and spirit to four words: God is in control. Weave these words into a life preserver that you hold onto as waves of emotion try to toss you and shake your resolve. God is in control. Rest in the knowledge that while memories have value, teaching us how to lead good lives through trial and error, the pain that latches onto those memories only gives our wrongdoers power over us that God did not give them and that they never deserved to have. God – and God alone – is in control.
But let’s be real again: Letting God assume his rightful place as the Force steering us towards forgiveness sounds nice and sophisticated in theory, but in practice, it does not always steep us in a sense of righteous fulfillment. After all, what did our wrongdoers do to deserve our forgiveness? To this questioning, I ask you: What did we do to deserve God’s forgiveness? Why in the world would someone as blameless as Jesus take up a cross, made unbearably heavy and atrophied by our collective sins, to purchase us a salvation that we have by no means earned? These questions may not bring us closer to understanding why the world is so unjust in the first place, but they do offer us a beaming lighthouse amidst the darkness: Forgiveness is not a gesture of weakness, it is an act of love towards others and, most importantly, towards ourselves. We must walk in forgiveness for our own self-protection, with grace forming the wind at our back and the confidence that God will hold the unjust to account forming the solid ground beneath our feet.
Nelson Mandela, a man who stunned the world through his relentless and radical forgiveness of truly terrible people, famously said that “Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.” The next time you are tempted to latch onto a grudge for the temporary comfort it offers, remember that it is God who has prepared a table for you in the presence of your enemies. At that table, you can choose to sip from the cup of resentment, or you can turn to the sweet, overflowing cup of the Spirit that God has gifted you, and be filled with unmatched joy.
Prayer:
Dear Lord, we have done nothing to earn your infinite grace and mercy, but now that we have it, please give us the wisdom and strength to use it for your glory. Thank you for giving us your only Son as a template for achieving light and life on the other side of forgiveness’s painful process. Help us to trust that any punishment we try to inflict on our wrongdoers – even and especially when we are the ones who have wronged ourselves – is no match for the plans you have to prosper us amidst our aching. On behalf of those who have hurt us, be the cooling salve that heals the wounds we may not see. Fill their hearts from edge to edge with your love, so that there is no more room for them to project their own hurt onto people like us. Lord, as Captain of our ships in this turbulent sea called life, please advise us as we ride the billowing waves of complicated emotions. Guide us towards the shores of peace that are our birthright. And let your Spirit continue to reside in us, reminding us that You are in control.
Guiding Questions:
Who in your life do you most need to forgive to fully embrace the joy, peace, and blessed assurance that God wants you to claim for yourself?